I Choose to Follow

I will follow you wherever you go, but first pay off my college debt, and then I will do what you have called me to do. That is my dilemma.

Having total dependence on God is a scary thing. I try to work hard to pay for college, but at the same time I feel drawn to any ministry opportunity that comes my way. For awhile now I have felt as if a fire is burning inside of me ready to catch others afire for Christ. I have found and know my love and passion is to serve the one who's sandals I am unworthy to untie (Acts 13:25). But my fire and passion is slowly being stomped out by the shadow of debt hovering over my head.

How am I going to pay off college debt? I don't know! I have given my life, body, heart, mind, and soul to Christ, which has revealed to me a vision to do work for His kingdom through ministry. People in ministry don't really make money they raise money and are totally dependent on God. I can do nothing about my calling, I cannot change my desire, I will not lose heart, and somehow, I don't know how, but my debt will be paid.

My life is not my life. It is completely in the hands of the Father. He has everything under control and that's all I need to know. I was not created to please man but God. It has been hard though, since I am stuck in the middle of God's will and the possibility of disappointing people I love. The obvious choice is to follow God...

And that is what I am going to have to do. I choose to follow.